1:29 p.m.-2005-11-18 | Another painful day
Betrayl, pain, lies... that is all this world is consumed of. If there is a God, why would he let this continue. I would end the world again and try for a third time. Because living today isn't worth it. I think we're all better off dead. We live our whole lives waiting to die. When will peace finally win? When will pain vanish from existence and happiness finally reign? I need hope...but having my heart crushed by the one person I thought would never hurt me...where's my hope now? I am becoming nothing the more I rot in this godforsaken town. Everywhere I look is a memory of him. Some happy, some painful...most become painful becuase I miss him so bad. But he changed...into someone I don't understand. I tried...but I feel as though I was pushed away. I basically was.I had faith in us...it was the only thing i had faith in. and when you lose faith...what the hell are you left with?
...immobilized by my fear and soon to be blinded by tears...
