Speaking to the atmosphere no one's here and I fall into myself..

3:05 p.m.-2003-09-10 | Looking for a drop of rain...

So I don't really have anything interesting to write about. Homecoming's coming up, but I don't know if I wanna go. I asked Mike if he wanted to go but Lakeside's is the same night and he has to go to his so he can't. My friend Jarrod asked me but I don't know if I want to...just some shit that Nolan said to me when I told him makes me think twice. I mean Jarrod is a good friend of mine but Nolan is my best friend and I respect his judgement, ya know? I was talking to Nolan last night and I miss him so much. It sucks enough that my best friend is all the way in Florida when I fucking need him to be here...and then he never calls me anymore. I was so excited to talk to him last night. I'm trying to get him to come up for our senior year and he can live at my house. He's like a brother to us anyhow.

So blah, I really wanna see Mike but he's got shit to do all day. :( Figures. This w/e's going to suck as well b/c Friday we have a band thing and won't get home till midnight then saturday i have another band thing that will most likely be over at 8-9... blah. I just want to be with mike and i'll hardly get to see him.

anyhow. school sucks dude. people are do ignorant and just piss me off. I told off so many fucking ppl today. ugh. I hate them.

I like what Ember wrote in her diary about a goth-punk was walking down the street and a car full of kids yelled "freak" at him. then a week later he took out all his jewlery for a job interview and his best friend told him he looked like a "freak". hell yeah dude.

I wish it would rain. I love the rain. It's so pretty. And it seems to fit my mood. I feel like crying but I'm not that sad. Just kinda emotional today. Stupid Aunt Flow. Just wanna see the rain...

later days

...immobilized by my fear and soon to be blinded by tears...