So after band Nina took me to Mike's and him ryan tara and me came back to my house and chilled. I like him more and more everyday. But I'm so afraid to b/c of the past and shit like that. I mean when we were together before it was pretty shitty. We fought a lot. And he lost interest so easily. I don't need that to happen again. I just wish I knew what was going through his head. ya know? I just want this to work out like I know it could.

So I wrote another poem tonight and I was going to share it with you all (yeah like anyone reads this anyhow) but I don't feel like typing it out. Fuck it.

Maybe tommorrow will be better. Probably not though. I feel like such shit right now I can't even pretend to be optimistic.

"In my field of paper flowers,

and candy clouds of lullaby.

I lie inside myself for hours

and watch my purple sky fly over me" Evenascene-Imaginary...fucking awesome song.

well i suppose sleep would do me some good. night.

I wish I could just get lost in my dreams sometimes...they seem more real to me than anything else.

Later days

Jamie