Speaking to the atmosphere no one's here and I fall into myself..

9:34 p.m.-2003-10-30 | Love you no matter what

Haven't been on in forever. tonight sucks. I have too much shit on my mind. Let's just say I don't know how to deal with anything anymore. I'm just glad I have three very important people in my life here for me. Thank you guys so much...I love you with all my heart. I'm going through a tough time and it's nice to know I have true friends to stick by my side. And Mike, no matter how this shit ends up...I love you. I hope it goes the way we both want it to...ya know. scary eh?

Okay. there's this kid that I'm real good friends with and thought I felt something for but I'm starting to not think so anymore. I don't know what to do. B/c I love hanging out with him and having him as a friend. But I don't think I feel for him like that. I guess I need to think shit out and w/e. I need to clear some other shit out.

okay...tommorrow should be fun. most likely going to watch the SPW thing after school so I can finally see Mike wrestle. then going trick or treating with nina and maybe mike (we're going as hippies :) then going to doug's party. fun. I have "happy" pills to take tommorrow too. will at least get me through the day. yay. anyhow.

stomach's starting to hurt...going to go to bed and get away from the drama for one night...

later days

...immobilized by my fear and soon to be blinded by tears...